Call Santa.

Kenley hands me the phone...

Kenley: "You gotta call Santa."
Me: "Why?"
Kenley: "Tell him I want a Pillow Pet."

Safely.

*trying to climb up the side of my chair*

"I can't get up here safely.  You gotta help me, Mom."

Hot Dog.

Kenley: "I want a hot dog."
Me: "You want a hot dog for breakfast?"
Kenley: "No, I want it in my hand."

Booger Mouth.

*incomprehensible crying from back seat*
Me: "What are you crying about, Kenley?"
Kenley: *over-tired dramatic crying*
"I got a booger in my mouth!!"

Grubby.

"Me take a shower?  I'm grubby."

Birthday Lickins.

Me: "You know, it was Daddy's birthday.  Did you tell him 'Happy Birthday' lots?"
Kenley: "And give him birthday lickins?"
Me: "Yeah, go give him some birthday lickins. I bet he'd like that."
*Kenley runs up to Daddy and licks the back of his pants a couple of times*
Me: "Nooo!  You don't actually lick him!  A lickin' is a spanking on the butt!!"
Kenley: "Oh." *spanks Daddy's butt*

Burp Me.

*Kenley lays down on belly on couch*

"Dad, burp me."
*Daddy pats her back*
"Burrrrp. Burp me 'gain!"
*Daddy pats her back*
"Buurrrp."