flat as a puddle.

Kenley: "Dad, I feel like all my bones are gonna crack."
Dad: "Well, you don't want that."
Kenley: "No, cuz then I would be flat as a puddle."

helper.

Me: "How was school today?"
Kenley: *sighs* "I was the helper."
Me: "You don't like being the helper?"
Kenley: "I just want to be a kid."