Call Santa.

Kenley hands me the phone...

Kenley: "You gotta call Santa."
Me: "Why?"
Kenley: "Tell him I want a Pillow Pet."

Safely.

*trying to climb up the side of my chair*

"I can't get up here safely.  You gotta help me, Mom."

Hot Dog.

Kenley: "I want a hot dog."
Me: "You want a hot dog for breakfast?"
Kenley: "No, I want it in my hand."

Booger Mouth.

*incomprehensible crying from back seat*
Me: "What are you crying about, Kenley?"
Kenley: *over-tired dramatic crying*
"I got a booger in my mouth!!"

Grubby.

"Me take a shower?  I'm grubby."

Birthday Lickins.

Me: "You know, it was Daddy's birthday.  Did you tell him 'Happy Birthday' lots?"
Kenley: "And give him birthday lickins?"
Me: "Yeah, go give him some birthday lickins. I bet he'd like that."
*Kenley runs up to Daddy and licks the back of his pants a couple of times*
Me: "Nooo!  You don't actually lick him!  A lickin' is a spanking on the butt!!"
Kenley: "Oh." *spanks Daddy's butt*

Burp Me.

*Kenley lays down on belly on couch*

"Dad, burp me."
*Daddy pats her back*
"Burrrrp. Burp me 'gain!"
*Daddy pats her back*
"Buurrrp."

P-U.

After we pass by a dead skunk on the road...

"That smell good! No, P-U! That stinks."

Man Cave.

"The fwigerator!  The one in Grandpa's man cave!"

Broken Legs.

"Dad, you gotta help me! I got broken legs!"

Pee Run.

"I need to pee.  I need to run."

That Dog.

Me: "Bruno, get out of my face! What do you want?"
Kenley: "Ugh. That dog."

Huh.

Me: "Put that back, please, it's expensive."
Kenley: "Huh?"
Me: "You heard me, quit with the 'huh'."
Kenley: "That a bad word?"
Me: "No, it's not a bad word, I'm just tired of you saying it."
Kenley: "Huh?"

MOM.

Kenley: "Mom.  Mom.  Mama.  MOM!!"
Me: "Yes, Kenley?"
Kenley: "Hi."
Me: "Is that all you wanted with all that yelling?"
Kenley: "Yup."

Mermaid.

Daddy is helping Kenley get dressed and accidentally puts both of her legs in the same leg of her pants...

"I'm a mermaid!"

Christmas List.

Kenley looking at Target's Christmas toy ad...

"I want this from Christmas. And this from Christmas. I want this from Christmas, too."

Kickin' It.

"I kick you in the ass!"