use this.

While helping her sister open her gifts...

"It looks like I could use this!"

popsicle.

"Um, Mommy? I want a popsicle to go with Rapunzel when I'm done eating my lunch."

plan.

 After sharing our Christmas Eve plans...

"Thank you for letting me hear your plan. That's a good plan. Now I don't want to hear any more questions out of you. Okay?"

one foot.

While I'm laying sick on the couch, Kenley comes and plunks down on me...

Kenley: "I love you."
Me: "I love you too, but can you not come within three feet of me?"
Kenley: "But I only have one foot!"

my life.

After staying home from school sick and our dog getting loose outside...

"This is just my life. This is not my life. We don't have a dog anymore."

does it right.

Kenley: "I'm so hungry."
Aunty Debbie: "Hang on, I need coffee. I don't even know what's goin' on yet."
Kenley: "You don't know what's going on, cause you're not doing it right. My mom does it right."

antique.

Kenley: "Dad, what's an antique?"
Daddy: "It's something old, kinda like your dad."
Kenley: "And like Aunty Shannon?"

goin' on.

In response to her sister throwing a fit...

"Why is this even goin' on?!"

top secret.

Kenley: "What are you doing?"
Daddy: "It's top secret."
Kenley: "I'll look away." *shields eyes*

creepy thing.

After seeing her Elf on the Shelf for the first time this year...

"Where'd you get that creepy thing from? Oh, it's my Elf!"

no fork.

 After serving her lunch...

"I didn't want no fork or no plate!"

watchin' you.

Following a third request to put her jacket on...

Kenley: *jabs finger at her Elf on the Shelf* "You're bein' mean, and he's watchin' you!"

surprise.

Kenley: "Mommy, I got a surprise for you!"
*I hold my hands out and Kenley pulls her hands out from behind her back, revealing a giant booger on her finger*
Me: "That's not a surprise, that's a booger."
Kenley: "Oh."
Me: "But thank you for bringing it to me."

ears.

After getting a talking to about being mean to her sister...

"If I didn't have ears, I'm not gonna listen to ANYTHING!"

pajama drawer.

Me: "Do any of the other kids in your class have an Elf on the Shelf?"
Kenley: "No. I wonder if he has a pajama drawer."
Me: "A pajama drawer?"
Kenley: "Yeah, because when the sun goes down, the moon comes up, and he puts his pajamas on and goes to bed."