Monday, December 1, 2014

flat as a puddle.

Kenley: "Dad, I feel like all my bones are gonna crack."
Dad: "Well, you don't want that."
Kenley: "No, cuz then I would be flat as a puddle."


Me: "How was school today?"
Kenley: *sighs* "I was the helper."
Me: "You don't like being the helper?"
Kenley: "I just want to be a kid."

Monday, October 27, 2014


While discussing the day's trip to the zoo...

Me: "That hippo listens better than you, Kenley!"
Kenley: "Yeah. What?"

Sunday, October 19, 2014

baby seeds.

After being asked if she'd rather have a baby brother or a baby sister...

Kenley: "I want to have a baby brother. How do you plant the baby seed? Can I go to the baby store with you and pick out a boy baby seed?"

Sunday, September 28, 2014

vitamin seeds.

Kenley: "Dad, can I have some raisins?"
Dad: "Sure, raisins are good for you."
Kenley: "Do they have vitamin seeds in them?"
Dad: "Well, I don't know if they have vitamin seeds, but they do have some vitamin C."


While checking out some horses, one of them does that "pppppppppppt" thing that they do with their lips very loudly, making Kenley jump.

"I'm gonna stay back over here in case that horse does that "PPPPPPPPPPPT" thing again."

Thursday, September 25, 2014

jack's butt.

*While discussing out dinner of pork butt roast...*

Kenley: *whispering* "Mom. We're gonna eat Jack's butt. Hehehehehehe"

Friday, August 8, 2014


Kenley: "Mom?"
*open eyes*
Me: "What?"
Kenley: *jabs me with pregnancy test* "Can I take your temperature?"

Thursday, August 7, 2014


While watching a movie...

"Ew, they're kissing! I am never going to kiss a boy."

boob milk.

"Mom, when the baby is born, are you gonna feed it milk from your boob like you did with Adley?"

Friday, August 1, 2014

famous footwear.

"Mom, you wanna get some Famous Footwear for me, since I'm pretty sure I don't have those?"

Tuesday, June 10, 2014


"Me and Adley were standing up in the middle of the TV playing with our balls. I mean...  balloons. I accidentally said 'balls.'"

Tuesday, June 3, 2014


While watching the video for "Wrecking Ball"...

"Her eyebrows are like spiders."


While talking about going camping...

"Will we get a badge if we start a fire?"

Monday, June 2, 2014


While listening to her baby sister throwing a tantrum...

"She sure is a beast."


Kenley: "Mom, can I have some more pepperonis?"
Me: "No, you don't need anymore."
Kenley: "But since I spotted them, can't I have another one?"

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Thursday, May 1, 2014


After our wet dog brushed past her...

"Hey! You putted wetness all over me, Bruno!"

Thursday, April 24, 2014

only one.

Kenley: "Dad, can I have some monies for my wallet?"
Dad: *opens wallet, hands her a dollar bill* "Here, you can have this."
Kenley: "Only one I'm getting?"


"I don't want the crackers that make your voice taste bad."

Friday, April 18, 2014


"Next time you go to Target, you buy me the mouth rinse, the ribbon wand, and I want two ponies. Okay?"

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

grandma's birthday.

"I told my teacher that I'm not going to be at school tomorrow because tomorrow is my grandma's birthday, and I have to be at my grandma's house for her birthday."

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

drink my dinner.

When Kenley caught Mom consuming a bottled adult beverage...

"Are you drinking your dinner from a bottle?"


"Your hair, it's smooth. Sometimes I stare at it, and then a little chick pops out. Peep! Peep! Peep! Peep! Peep!"

Monday, February 17, 2014

good day.

Daddy: "How was your day?"
Kenley: "It was good, so I need to tell you all about it right now on the phone."

woodpecker lips.

While playing with the dog and his chew toy...

"Do you think I'm tougher than woodpecker lips?! OH YEAH!"

the boss.

After being told her cousins are sleeping over...

"Grandpa says I'm the boss of the babies. I'm gonna teach them all the rules. I'm gonna take them off of chairs, I'm gonna take them off stools, I'm gonna take them off all the high things."

Friday, February 14, 2014


"Big Uncle Larry stays on the toilet forever. And he gets off when he's done. And he reads newspapers. I do that, too."


Kenley: "What's that ring for?
Me: "It's Dad's wedding ring. When people get married they wear wedding rings on their fingers."
Kenley: "So you said, *uses voice to imitate me* 'Hey, Sam, will you meet me at a weddin'?'"


In response to me putting her sister's footie pajamas on my head like a hat...

"You look like Jesus' moms."

every day.

Talking about her Hello Kitty sandals...

"I wear these every day, but not all the time."


"When you're brushing your teeth, you can sing the ABC's when you have a headache. Destini said that."

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Wednesday, February 5, 2014


"My cousins told me to give you a hug and a kiss when we were talkin' on Skype on my pretend computer."

*Proceeds to fake type*

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

crab sass.

"My sister's bein' a crab sass."


"Daddy, I just farted in this chair. Mom, I just farted on your leg."

cash money.

While looking at my sunglasses...

"These say 'cash money' on them."


While drawing a picture of grass...

"I made some grass because I was in high school before. I mean...  my old school."


*Presses her ear against my back*

"I can hear the washer inside you, Mom!"

Sunday, February 2, 2014


Getting ready to sit on the couch to watch a movie...

"I gotta squeeze in to this family."

Sunday, January 19, 2014


"Mom, will you scratch my feet? And don't stop until I say to stop."

Saturday, January 18, 2014

bunny cup.

"My grandma has a bunny cup with a swirly straw and she lets me use it always sometimes."

Friday, January 17, 2014

cow tippin'.

Kenley: "Mommy, what's 'cow tippin'?"
Me: "Where'd you hear that at?"
Kenley: "From my grandma."
Me: "It's when you tip a cow over that's sleeping."
Kenley: "Oh. I can do that when I'm awake!"

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

that's great.

After the dog sneezed on us...

"Thanks for sneezin' on my people, Bruno. That's great."

fat chicken.

 After I did a weird gallop through the living room...

"You just runned like a fat chicken."

Monday, January 6, 2014

better sense.

In response to Daddy getting mad at the football game on TV...

"Maybe we should shut it off. We could shut if off and turn cartoons on. That makes better sense."

Saturday, January 4, 2014

take this.

 After Dad tells her to quiet down and eat...

"I'm not gonna really take this."

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Wednesday, January 1, 2014


 While enjoying her first iPod experience...

"Adley you gotta stop hittin' me while I'm listenin' to music!"